Ceire Nevins is a proud IVF mama to twin girls and her son (naturally). She received her fertility coaching certificate through the Institute of Integrative Nutrition and lives in Boston.
I lied about doing in vitro fertilization (IVF) for over two years because I was ashamed.
So, through years of struggling in silence, I hid my fertility treatments from family, friends, and co-workers.
No one knew our twin girls were born through IVF.
Then, only a few months after the birth of our twins, we were shocked to learn we were pregnant with our son.
Consequently, our son’s natural birth helped me further conceal my fertility struggles. I had “gotten away” with doing IVF, and no one would have the choice to judge my decisions or my body.
But I was not only lying to the people in my life; I was lying to myself. The guilt and shame of keeping IVF a secret continued to take root within me.
Opening up to a new friend
Then, two years later, I met Jess, a neighbor who also had twins through IVF. She spoke so openly about her experience.
I finally had someone I could talk about this with and relate to the emotional roller coaster of IVF and infertility. I no longer felt alone, ashamed, and broken.
Instead, I felt seen, heard, and valued. Through her confidence, I gained the courage and strength to open up and share my story.
Jess quickly became one of my best friends and is my “twin flame,” someone who mirrors you, showing you your deepest insecurities and fears while helping you overcome them. My twin flame taught me that I was not alone and had nothing to be ashamed of.
My story, which I once hid from has become my purpose and passion for helping other women as their fertility coach. I learned the vital importance of connection, community, and living life with integrity. Infertility is a disease that affects 1 in 8 couples.
By sharing our stories, we can end the stigma and help spread awareness.
In this infertility community, we are all twin flames, supporting and guiding each other through our journeys. So, if you are struggling with infertility, secondary infertility, or pregnancy loss, remember that you are not broken, this is not your fault, and, most of all, you are not alone.