Why Actress Meagan Good Waited to Have Sex Until Marriage
Advocacy After a series of long-term relationships didn’t work out, actress Meagan Good was ready for a change. She swore off sex and committed to abstinence until marriage.
The decision was personal and it might have been risky since Good, a former child actor, was transitioning to grownup TV and film roles.
“The biggest surprise was that it was so well received,” says the 35-year-old actress, known for her work in films like “Think Like a Man” and shows like BET’s “A Girl Like Grace.”
While at first it was confusing for some in Hollywood, Good ensured everyone the journey was hers.
“Listen, I’m not telling you what to do,” she says. “I’m not asking you to do something. I’m just saying, ‘This is my story. This I what I went through.’”
Empowered by her decision, Good says celibacy was transformational.
“The practice of the wait and the control transformed every area of my life,” she says, explaining it changed people's perception of her and created more career opportunities as well.
It even helped her get her finances in order. Best of all, celibacy gave Good “self-love, more peace, clarity and discernment.”
It also prepared her for love.
“When DeVon and I got together, the way it took me to learn someone in three years, I knew him that way in three months.”
While working on the movie, “Jumping the Broom,” in 2010, Good connected with one of the film’s executives, DeVon Franklin, who was also waiting until marriage.
“When DeVon and I got together, the way it took me to learn someone in three years, I knew him that way in three months,” she says. “I was able to really, really see who this man is without needing him, without being dependent on him.”
Good explains there was no pressure on the relationship, which was focused on getting to know each other.
“I know for a fact that this is someone I can spend the rest of my life with,” she says. “I’ve never been so sure about anything.”
Good and Franklin, who is now president and CEO of his own production company, Franklin Entertainment, waited until they got married in 2012 to have sex.
Together they wrote a book about their decision to wait for sex, “The Wait: Powerful Practice and Finding the Love of Your Life and the Life You Love.”
Good says couples that have a true connection and love each other don’t have to rely on sex as the thing that makes a relationship work.
Still the physical connection is important in marriage.
“You still have to figure things out, learn each other's bodies, figure out what each other likes and doesn't like,” she says.
The biggest lesson Good learned from celibacy? "That I am worth it," she says, noting that loving herself and knowing she’s complete is “truly a gift.”
She advises other women, as well as men, to have control over their lives and not to settle. “That understanding has become my purpose,” she says, describing how self-control can help individuals be “free and powerful.”